This break was unlike others. Any of the others.
I took care of myself. My husband helped me take care of myself.
We rested, we ate, we enjoyed time.
We cleaned, ran errands, did projects that were well past needing to do, and we traveled too, but we rested.
It’s true what so many elders say, as you age, material things, worldly things matter less and less. I wanted this Christmas and break to be simple. To be about time.
I didn’t force anyone to be in this time. If it had just been Shiloh and I, that’s how it would’ve been. I just simply voiced my choices and plans and went on about it.
I focused on my relationship with God. I know 2020 is all about God. I have had the resolution for the past three years for that year to be about God. There’s more to this statement obviously, but each year has brought me closer. However, I feel this is the first break where I felt The Holy Spirit right there with me, in me, for me. I saw Him in my loved ones, I saw Him in strangers. I felt Him moving and healing.
I just know that 2020 will be a pivotal shift. For some, this will hurt like hell. I’m probably “some”. I am ready. 2019 was a reactive year. So overwhelmed by the things happening “to” me that I couldn’t focus on what I needed to make happen. God carried me through on prayers and sheer determination. 2020, year of proactive.
2019 I watched my infant turn in to a one year old….hands down a huge blessing. 2019 gave me a 17 year old, driving, working, senior in high school, who opened my eyes to her growth and maturity….hands down a blessing to me. 2019 showed me once again that my husband is who God has for me.
2019 also threatened to take away one of the most important people in my life. The single most influential woman in my life. It did not. Prayer and determination again I believe won out. 2020 may not come and go before I face this devastation, but I am with God and He is with me and my family. He will make it okay. I can pray that 2020 comes and goes too with my Nanna right by my side. God does hear my prayers.
I feel I got prayers answered that had hung over me for a while. Career wise, priorities wise, and I feel I’ll be a better version of me for it.
So come on 2020. I’ll embrace you and love you no matter how hard you come at us. We are family, we are Gods children, and I have prayed circles around my loved ones. If prayer truly protects your loved ones…then odds are if you’re reading this….You’re protected!
Much love and the peace of the Lord wished to each and every one.
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